June 2nd, 2002

Adrasteius: Really?  Really.

emotional waste

When I was at Emiko's house a few days ago, she randomly hugged me and told me that I'd never angered her (well, pissed her off XD). I don't know why, but for some reason I expect it's going to be one of those things that sticks in my memory. It's a little strange what the memory holds on to sometimes... like I can still sing most of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles theme song, if prompted, but the entirety of the Unit Circle is already very far gone.

But anyway...

I know a lot of people. I know a lot of people offline, and I know a lot of people online. And while I have some -good- friends (like Emiko for example, and Alicia, and I expect I'd count Laris and Ali as good friends if they'd agree with that), I don't really have a best friend. I mean, I've known Alicia for most of my life, but I don't see her that often. I know many people online that I'd call good friends too, and friends, and so on.

Of online friends I would call Twolle my best friend, because we talk a lot and we know each other really well (or I feel like we do, twolle :3;). I wish you lived down here, or maybe even that I lived up there, Twolle... -_-

I don't know, this is stupid whining and I'm probably offending someone talking like this...but I just feel so alone sometimes. Everyone else seems to have these great clusters of very close friends and in every group I've -ever- been in--every group, online and off--I've always felt like the odd man out. And most of the time I'm not even in a group.

No doubt this is partly a result of my own paranoia... but... I don't know. I'm depressed. i need some more orange juice.
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    depressed depressed
Adrasteius: Really?  Really.


Oh--Happy Birthday, Gemi-fluffer! I, too, will draw you a picture, but it will pale in comparison to Laris-foo's greatness. What wouldst please thee?